​I’ve basically been screaming in rage and terror for the last hour, and I’ll tell you why — apparently, the lead in the American remake of Akira — the one produced by Leonardo DiCaprio’s company — might be Zac Efron. Yes, High School Musical‘s Zac Efron has been offered the role of Kaneda, or whatever the fuck he named in the American version (probably Taylor or Brody or some shit).

Now, my first few attempts to write an article on this news — which is still not set in stone, obviously — were nothing but pure profanity, but I think I’ve calmed down to at least the point where I can articulate the problem. It’s not technically with Zac Efron. That’s mainly because I’ve never watched him in something, but I have no personal proof that the boy can’t act. In fact, when there were rumors that he was going to get the role of Light in a Death Note movie, I thought he could’ve been good casting, because he brings with him such a goody goody, Disney-sanctified, pretty boy persona that would actually serve the role of Light well.

That said, you know what I’m reasonably certain Efron can’t play? A punk or a thug, two things the role of Kaneda (or Nathan or Jimmy Bob or whatever) very much is. He’s a fucking delinquent who gets into motorcycle fights to the death with other gangs.

​I HAVE MY DOUBTS THIS IS SOMETHING ZAC EFRON CAN EFFECTIVELY PORTRAY.

Errg. Need to calm down. Need to keep drinking. Maybe he’ll turn it down. Maybe the film will stay bogged down in pre-production. MAYBE AN ACTUAL GANG MEMBER WILL CLUB HIM TO DEATH WITH A CROWBAR FROM THE BACK OF A MOTORCYCLE AAAARRRRGGGHH

Excerpt from:
The Live-Action, American Akira Movie Could Be Worse Than We Imagined